For the past 6 years, I’ve been in and out of therapy with severe anxiety and panic disorder. Recently after a family member suffered a breakdown, I developed Depression as well as PTSD, my mood dropped to a new low where I couldn’t even leave the house, let alone go to work; I knew I needed to seek professional help. My GP and Stockport Psychological Wellbeing Service (Which I found searching on the Mind website) have been incredible and I began to take an SSRI named Citalopram. The anti-depressants caused me to feel more panicky and very anxious in the first few weeks, but as the weeks went on, I started to feel different. Less sad, but not quite there yet. So, as I’m awaiting my next lot of trauma-based CBT, I’ve been working on my self-help and self-love by myself in the comfort of my own home in order to make some kind of progress, even small steps are better than nothing, and always worth celebrating.
Everyone’s symptoms and treatments will be different.
Whilst I find yoga, meditation and reading effective to calm my mind, it may not work for others the same. I know my anxiety better than anyone, and I know my limits. The key to my self-help journey is to push myself, but never push myself too far. To stop when I feel my anxiety rising, If I feel agitated, or I’m ruminating on past traumas that I’ve experienced, yoga has been my number 1 in order to ground myself whilst bringing back the control over my body. I roll out my mat in my bedroom, with lit candles I can breathe in the moment and breathe out all the negative thoughts. Not only has this done wonders for my chaotic mind, but also improved my strength and flexibility without me even realising.
I don’t remember the last time I ever felt so proud of myself!
When I began practicing yoga and meditation, I was barely able to sit still for more than 5 minutes, I certainly couldn’t touch my toes anymore! But without thinking, I’ve managed to hold myself in arm stands and downward dog for hours without the slightest thought of feeling unsafe or worry. Basically, it’s the most amazing feeling I have ever felt! I’ve never been so proud of myself for being able to truly give in to relaxation and block those negative thoughts from my mind.
Yoga has been the best thing I could have ever began, alongside reading many self-help books including those written by the amazing Dawn French and Ruby Wax, I have been able to accomplish a sense of self-respect and accept my illness for what it is, whilst bettering myself and becoming stronger every day for it.
It will take a long time to recover from fully from my past, but I finally feel I’m on the right track to a happy and healthy life.
You’re strong. You can get through this.
Until the next time,